Tuesday, July 15, 2008

Five For Fighting

Yeah, so... a friend of mine tried to break up a fight this weekend and in the process got his jaw broken. Actually he was trying to prevent a massively one sided pounding from taking place, coming to the aid of a single guy getting tenderized by half a dozen assailants.

First of all, this happened in a huge crowd. (Steam beginning to rise) What the hell is wrong with people that there wasn't a flood of strong arms to break this up? Oh yeah. The fingers on the ends of those arms were likely too busy text messaging to be bothered.

dood ths guy is totally getting pounded

no way

yeah wanna play Xbox 2nite?


And secondly, what the hell ever happened to a fair fight? What happened to, "You and me by the bike rack after school!" In some small way it was like chivalry in days of old. Now if you want to settle with some punk for hitting on your girl you just get five buddies and sucker punch him when he's not looking.

I'll admit, the testosterone gets to pumping when I hear about something like this, especially when it's about someone I know. Somewhere deep in my cells, the Y chromasomes start beating a battle march. And then I think back to the one time I ever punched someone in the face in anger and how awful I felt about it later. Shortly after that though departs, I start thinking about how utterly satisfying it used to be when I could outsmart, humiliate, and otherwise discredit and demoralize my adversary using my wits alone.

Gone are those days. I guess I'll have to train my sons to travel in packs and always keep an eye on the blind spots. You never know when some riotous band of revenge seekers might pop up and ruin your face for life because of something somebody said about somebody's girlfriend. (Pretty much boiling now)

I'm pretty sure I've devised a method to head off this type of behavior in future generations of boys though. I've already begun sowing the seeds. Curious? You'll have to read my other blog to find out what it is. CLICK HERE TO SEE.

1 comment:

  1. I'm curious to find out if people don't comment because nobody wants to be the first one. So I'll go first this time, like seeding the tip jar. OK... now you.


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