Sunday, January 13, 2008

Pining Away

Well, it’s not quite spring yet, but my thoughts are turning to love. Mostly what a gawdawful mess it is. So I’m writing to any young folks who care to hear the advise of experience and avoid some heartache.

So, having just polished off the Harry Potter book in which he and Ginny finally get together, it reminded me so much of my own experience, which I’m sure parallels a lot of peoples’. Girl likes guy but is too shy to say anything, meanwhile, guy likes girl he can’t possibly get and nobody’s happy. Eventually guy starts to like girl but girl is inextricably involved with someone and still, nobody’s happy. Finally, at long last the two manage to get it together for a short period of time, but then something wrecks it and after the ever so brief period of happiness, nobody’s happy again.

I guess it may be an unavoidable part of high school life to have to go through all the longing and inaction, but it seems so unnecessary. It seems like the standard practice is to conceal any trace of one’s true feelings and mope around My own experience in high school wasn’t even as gratifying as Harry’s, no joy for this guy. I spent the entire six years of junior high and high school pining away for girls who would never like me, only to find out long after the fact that there were not one, not two, but at least three girls who would have been more than happy to be my girlfriend.

I spent what was then a third of my short life banging my head against the wall, in misery because I couldn’t get the babe. Never mind that if I had actually managed to date one of these unattainable girls it would have fallen apart immediately either due to lack of compatibility with their elevated social circles, but much more likely because I so idolized them that there was no possible way they could live up to my expectations. Meanwhile there were girls that were friends with my friends, liked what I liked, and really just wanted my arm around them.

So here’s the long delayed advise in a nutshell. For starters, if you’re pining away for someone higher up the food chain, just ask her out already! In rare instances it actually works out so there’s hope for you fans of Beauty and the Geek. And if it doesn’t work out, you may have to endure a day or two of ridicule, but at least you can stop yourself short of developing a full scale stalking complex. There’s not a girl in the world that doesn’t find that creepy and it’s no fun for your guy friends to have to watch that either fellas.

Now, once you’ve popped the question and either weathered the short lived derision of your peers (let’s face it, we’re talking chance in a million on that Beauty and the Geek scenario) take a look around and see who’s making eyes at you. Chances are there’s somebody who’d be thrilled to be with you and really, wouldn’t it be better to have someone on your arm who’s a little less attractive but loves you to bits than some hottie that you have to constantly worry about leaving you?

There it is folks, take it or leave it. I’m not saying that I would have taken this advice had somebody given it to me when I was thirteen, but then again, maybe I would have and could have enjoyed my love life during that period instead of having to console myself with being


  1. "and really, wouldn’t it be better to have someone on your arm who’s a little less attractive but loves you to bits than some hottie that you have to constantly worry about leaving you?"

    Ouch. Hope that's not in reference to your darling wife.

  2. My darling wife has something about her eyes when she's saying something clever that makes her more beautiful to me than any other woman ever could be.

  3. why, thank you, i find myself to be blushing.


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